Why did you choose to wear a chastity cage? Apart from curiosity or the purpose of self-discipline, in a BDSM relationship, male chastity means the establishment of the submissive role, where your suppressed pleasure and desire are controlled by the Dominant. Of course, the true meaning of submission goes far beyond a chastity device.
In everyday life, submission is often labeled as weakness or retreat. Many men, when they want to explore and embrace their submissive side, will have many concerns, worrying about losing their masculinity or being overwhelmed by shame. But in the BDSM relationship of male chastity, we should discard such absurd and worldly views and learn how to gain pleasure from the role of submission.
Starting a fun submissive relationship is not that easy. Lowering yourself, adapting to your role and circumstances, and maintaining continuous and effective communication are especially important. Submission does not mean depriving the submissive of their thoughts; expressing your ideas in a timely manner can lay a solid foundation for the smooth progress of your play.
How to Define The BDSM Submissive?
Anne O Nomis (historian and psychology researcher) once explained what a submissive is in her work:
“submissive → sub placeur (meaning pleasing submissive): someone who takes their pleasure from pleasing their Mistress and submitting to their Mistress.”
In other words, a submissive is a role type that gains satisfaction by pleasing and obeying the Mistress. This definition emphasizes: BDSM Submissive is not forced, but a psychological reward derived from active service.
In Anne O. Nomis’s perspective, submission is a journey of experience organized through aesthetics and ritualization. The “pleasing-type” submissive exists because they tie their pleasure to “understanding and fulfilling the Dominant’s desires” as the main thread; from awe and surrender, to bondage, training, trance, reversal, and fetishism, each stage can become an anchor for the submissive’s meaning and pleasure.
The Charm of Chastity Submission
From the male perspective, men’s social roles are usually burdened with many responsibilities and rights. Through chastity submission, they can overturn their social roles, completely relax their body and mind, empty their thoughts, and not have to make any decisions—just follow the Dominant’s will and embrace the side of themselves that is not expected. This can make them feel very free.Becoming a Chastity Male Submissive can bring non-traditional pleasures that cannot be experienced from sex itself. For example, you may enjoy being electroshocked, spanked, leashed, or receiving anal stimulation while playing the submissive role, becoming a chance to open new areas of intimate play.
Different Styles of Submissive In Chastity
There are many types of submission. Different styles can create different atmospheres. According to your own traits and preferences, choosing a submissive style sets the tone for your submissive play. Below we list some typical styles, hoping to give you some inspiration.
Pet Play: Entering the role of an animal without autonomy while in chastity—for example, dog, cat, tiger, bull, or even pig (these themed chastity cages can all be found in our “Resin Cock Cage”). Different animal roles reflect different submissive atmospheres. Collars, tail plugs, and leashes can reinforce this animalized identity, where pleasing the Master is their only purpose of existence.
Service Slave: The service-oriented submissive style focuses more on practical actions: cleaning, serving tea, giving massages, taking care of the Master, doing housework, etc. The slave exchanges the humiliation of labor for the Master’s smile. The harder the labor, the more they may feel that being deprived of pleasure is a justified punishment. Of course, sex itself is also a form of service.
Bondage: When chastity and bondage combine, the submissive experience becomes even more complete. The body is locked by ropes or restraints, the penis is encased in steel or plastic, and the wearer has no room even for the most basic struggle. Many people experience a sense of security in this despair, because all choices have been handed over to the Master, and they can only sink into the state of being fully controlled.
Worship: Some wearers achieve submission by treating the Dominant as a deity. Wearing a chastity cage is not just about forbidding masturbation, but a kind of religious offering: the cock is dedicated to the Master, the body and soul belong to the Master. They may wear the cage in ritualized scenes, kneel, kiss the Master’s toes, and thereby reinforce their devotion and chastity.
What Makes an Excellent Submissive Man
There is no fixed correct way to become an excellent submissive; it completely depends on you or your Dominant’s expectations. Follow your inner thoughts and freely act according to your needs. Find a cooperative way that makes both of you comfortable, allowing your play to last a long time without becoming boring.
Summarize experiences from continuous submissive practice and keep adjusting. A submissive does not mean blind obedience—you need to have your own mind. No Dominant wants a submissive who is just a soulless puppet. A truly excellent submissive must learn how to give themselves up, while also keeping clear communication and self-awareness when handing over their freedom.
Understand yourself clearly. This means having the courage to write down your desires, boundaries you can try, and absolute hard limits. Making these known to your Dominant is equivalent to saying: “This is everything I am willing to give, and also the bottom line I must keep.” Such honesty does not weaken submission; on the contrary, it allows the Dominant to feel your transparency and trust, making them more assured in controlling you.
Serve proactively. A truly excellent submissive, like a well-trained attendant, is able to anticipate the Master’s needs and prepare in advance.
An excellent submissive is not defined by how much they can endure, but by being safer, more reliable, and more sustainable: able to negotiate, able to execute, able to review, and able to repair.
If you want to learn how to become an excellent keyholder, you can gain some inspiration from our other article “How To Be A Keyholder: From Beginner to Master.”